...big ball of crazy

For the longest time, I've wanted to put into words the out of body experience I've felt for the last year, trying to re-incorporate into the city and life I love so much.

But I couldn't, other than the fact that I feel like my own skin is choking me.

I found this passage that kinda helps describe what my head is like... and a little bit of that last scene in L'Auberge Espagnol where the main character just runs...

"The expatriate mentality is a tough thing to explain easily. Any affluent or even middle-class American who renounces the good life of sushi delivery and 50-channel cable television to relocate permanently to some third-world hole usually has to be motivated by a highly destructive personality defect. Either that, or something about home creates psychological demons that in turn create the urge for radical escape.

"I'd moved overseas straight out of college and been a classic expatriate ever since. I had all the symptoms: periodic unsuccessful attempts to repatriate, a tendency to try to make grandiose foreign adventures compensate for a total inability to accumulate money; bad teeth; unhealthy personal relationships, etc. I'd been aware for years that my passion for uprooting and completely changing my lifestyle and even my career was like a drug addiction-- not only did I get off on it, but I needed to do it fairly regularly just to keep from getting the shakes."

Matt, Taibbi, The Exile: Sex, Drugs, and Libel in the New Russia

Thank you Arron Hotfelder.

.... Countdown to October 31st.

Welcome to my first, public, non hissy-fit sounding blog. I like to start everything off with a "good morning" cuz, for me, it represents the birth of new opportunities.

I'm not sure what this blog is going to be, but I can tell you why I created it.

Oscar Wilde said
"I never travel without my diary. One should always have
something sensational to read on the train."

Hopefully with the spread of wireless, I should be able to read and write on a train, and share my big adventures with the great big void.

This brings me to travel. As most of you know, I'm hopefully going to have the opportunity to run around the planet in the next couple of months.


I guess, I started all of this, "the big ball of crazy" now, because as much as I love traveling and adventure, I love my home, my city, Toronto. I want to document some of Toronto before I leave because, in a strange way, I feel that when I finally come home, I'm going to be setting foot in Toronto, as if it is a foreign land.

(there was supposed to be a photo right here... but alas blogger is mad at me - so click here)

I'm not a writer, so please dont frequent my blog. I'm going to buy a camera tomorrow, so if anything, skim the pictures, and run off.

later days.

Sam